Before i Forget : Simon Jones's blog

March 1999


Meanwhile articleTuesday, March 16th, 1999, (7:56 pm)

Meanwhile : Articles written by Simon Jones

They say you shouldn’t drive a car when you are angry because in taking your anger out on the car, you may accidentally hurt someone. Do those same advisers think that getting behind a keyboard in anger is equally as ill advised? If so I am just about to go against their advice because I am here just about to write this weeks ‘Meanwhile’ and I am pissed off. Seriously pissed off at that!

I wish I knew what it was that people felt was ‘dodgy’ about me. I am thoroughly fed up with people using the word ‘dodgy’ in connection with me. For years people have branded me as some kind of threat or person to be weary of. From so called friends to absolute strangers, people have cast doubt over my character more times than I care to remember.

I’m not going to skate around this issue. Why should I watch my P’s and Q’s when there are those out there who would tarnish people’s opinion of me without a second thought? For years I have accepted the unfair labelling given to me by others. I have tried various different approaches of dealing with this from confrontation to ignoring it.

I have had preachers in churches label me as dangerous and then suffered the backlash of a whole bunch of ‘loving Christian folk’ treated me like some kind of sub-human and spread blatant lies about me. I have befriended a mother of a friend of mine when she needed a friend, only to have her rip into me whenever the opportunity arises. She has managed to color the opinion of others who now see me as dodgy and conveniently forget all the things I have done for them.

I have had a so called friend advise another friend of mine to steer clear of me because our friendship would “all end in tears”. I have had people who I thought were good friends express opinions about how they would “never go into business with Simon” because they couldn’t trust me.

Don’t these people think before they open their big mouths? Did they think these words would not get back to me? Or maybe they thought I wouldn’t care. Perhaps if it happened just once that would be the case, but for these people who I thought were friends to continually stab me in the back is really hard work to deal with… [Click here to continue reading this article at ‘Meanwhile’]

Meanwhile articleMonday, March 1st, 1999, (11:00 pm)

Meanwhile : Articles written by Simon Jones

You know what I hate most about being in business. Money. Well perhaps not the actual money more the process of actually getting the fee. You see for all my skills with people, I am still utterly hopeless at negotiating a price for anything. And sometimes I end up getting trampled on by clients who seize the opportunity to save their currency by making me feel uncomfortable about the whole fee situation.

“So how much is this going to cost?” That is my worst nightmare sentence. I am not kidding, I hate it when people say that because I am petrified that I’ll quote a price and they will then launch into some tirade of abuse because they feel I am not worth it.

Perhaps I am insecure, yes maybe that’s it. I have found the one bit of my character that is not comfortable with itself, and it’s the bit that has to get the rest of me paid. Darn!

Why could I not be insecure about my body in some way, or perhaps about my hair style (or lack thereof)? Why could I not be insecure about being a Mac User or even having an apartment above a hairdressers? Why is the only major thing I am not happy about the bread winning part of the deal?

Perhaps I need to go on an assertiveness course at the local Business link? Yes in actual fact I think that’s a good idea. No more hesitation for me. Now when confronted with some snarling company purse holder I can reflect on the teachings of the course and hammer home my rate with confidence.

I guess maybe it comes down to the fact that… [Click here to continue reading this article at ‘Meanwhile’]