I’m feeling really uninspired at the moment. My friend who was here visiting from America has gone and I’m working all hours on my biggest customers various website projects. I’ve done all the design and creative work, I did that months ago, all that remains is the laborious task of inputting the content and trying to prepare that in a way that doesn’t look mind numbingly boring. The only thing is, it is! The customer has provided no pictures to break up the mountains of text, and as a result the work is hideously boring.
Ordinarily I think I would charge through this like a hot knife through butter. I’d get it out of the way rapidly so as to move on to other more creatively challenging projects. But I feel like I am wading through a river of treacle with this project and when I do take time to come up for air the only thing i want to do is anything that doesn’t involve a computer, but not useful or exciting stuff, but stuff like watching TV, or going to the gym.
I feel totally bereft of inspiration or the inclination to be creative. I’ve not finished and published a ‘Meanwhile‘ article in months. I’ve not produced any new ‘Posh Telly‘ movies or created any new personal websites featuring the mountains of pictures I have taken. I feel like the only thing I have to show for the last year or so is just a bank balance with a few zero’s on the end of it – something which isn’t exactly inspiring or even that important to me.
I want to get these work projects out of the way then take a couple or three weeks to go and ‘dream it up again.’ I need to take some time to just produce some stuff. To write, to make movies, to hang some of my photography in frames on my walls, to be creative!
Maybe I’ve just been immersed in people too much of late. I was ‘on the road’ for a month in America (yes I know the pics are still curiously absent) and then my friend was here visiting. Make no mistake, I love having friends visit, but maybe what i need now is a little downtime you know? I told a friend that the other day but she just laughed and said “You want a holiday? You’re always on holiday Simon!” Something which I can’t exactly argue with if the true be known.
And tomorrow I have to go to the funeral of some girl who died last week of cancer. I didn’t know her that well but her friends wanted me to go and so it seemed like the right thing to do. Then in the evening I’ll be working at the bar taking pictures and being “Simon!” everyones favorite photographer friend.
I just want a little alone time you know? I’m not feeling sad or anything like that. Make no mistake, I love my life, but I just feel a little overcrowded at the moment. Maybe a little suffocated. I just need a little room to breath, space to think, and time to find my inspiration again, that’s all.
Wrote the following comment on Aug 25, 2005 at 12:59 pm
Being on vacation isn’t the same as relaxing .. Sometimes I just have to unplug the phone and avoid people. Good luck :)
Wrote the following comment on Aug 25, 2005 at 3:19 pm
Solitude – I can’t live without it. I guess it’s fair to say that I go through cycles in my life and there are times when solitude is essential – then there are times when I need friends. Last night I had the evening to myself – it was a big breath of fresh air. I need more.
Wrote the following comment on Aug 25, 2005 at 6:51 pm
sounds like you need to put down that camera…find yourself a nice,tall, sexy blonde ::cough,cough::….. let her give you a nice, deep tissue massage….and…uhh….gosh, I’m getting carried away here.
!
Wrote the following comment on Aug 26, 2005 at 3:59 am
Take a day… one can’t hurt. Call in sick to the world, forget to turn on your cell phone, crawl in a hole and pull it in after you whatever, that will prolly recharge your batteries better than a week’s vacation.
Wrote the following comment on Aug 26, 2005 at 4:55 am
I’m with garden gal… Solitude is the thin string that holds me to what’s left of my sanity.
Wrote the following comment on Aug 27, 2005 at 5:30 am
It is in the time of silence that we come to the realizations of who we are and what we will be. When we are with others we are filling our souls. When we are alone we are emptying our souls for others to see. Solitude is fundamental to creativity.
Wrote the following comment on Sep 1, 2005 at 2:11 pm
I’m very busy, and when it comes to xanga and stuff, like I said, I’m feeling uninspired.