Three weeks ago I dropped my laptop in the bath for the second time. That might sound rather unusual, however what I find even more unexpected is the fact that it still works perfectly!
The first question I expect you want to ask is what on earth was I doing with my laptop in the bath? The answer is fairly simple – I was watching the latest episode of ‘Lost.’
I used to read books in the bath, but with the steam and heat I found that holding a book was neither relaxing nor practical. I like to soak for long periods of time in baths that are just this side of uncomfortably hot, the idea being that they will cool down over the time I am in soaking amid the bubbles – and yes, there are bubbles too! So you see, the problem with books and the bath is that I often dozed off with a book in my hand; a book that is then quickly transformed into paper mache.
I then came up with the idea of watching movies on my laptop while I soaked in the bath. To me this seemed like the perfect union of relaxation, entertainment, and practical cleanliness. It was, I thought, a masterstroke of time management and life balance efficiency!
I located a glass shelf with plastic feet that fitted neatly across my bathtub. Upon this I would place a small hand towel on which my trusty MacBook would be located while I laid back and enjoyed a movie or TV show. It was all very luxurious and amid the subtle and ambient lighting it felt somewhat decadent too.
Of course, a laptop computer (especially a Mac) is considerably more expensive than a paperback book, so when I first saw the glowing screen plunge into the bath water with near slow motion grace, I had reason to rethink my newly found ‘CineSpa.’
At that moment, while the on-screen action continued, the serenity of the bathroom scene was shattered by the quickly unfolding digital drama. Splashing around like swimmer caught in the jaws of a shark I thrashed a watery exit from the tub and reached beneath the bubbles to rescue the MacBook. Initially, like the band on the deck of the Titanic, it continued to work as if nothing were wrong. However, a few moments later the screen flickered then went black as all noise from the laptop ceased and silence fell upon the bathroom.
That was more than two years ago, and surprisingly enough the plunge didn’t kill the MacBook. Like the ‘Six Million Dollar Man‘ the laptop was rebuilt, better and stronger than before. Maybe the wiser thing to have done would have been to revert back to reading soggy books, but I decided to continue with my ‘CineSpa’ times, discovering many a good movie in the tub; The Bucket List, Into the Wild, and Grizzly Man to name but a few.
As the final season of ‘Lost’ got underway there was no denying this was inescapably perfect ‘CineSpa’ material. So as temperatures outside dipped to near arctic lows, I slid into a dangerously hot bath to lose myself in a double bill of the hit TV series while sipping an ice cold deep red berry smoothie.
An hour or so into the show I decided to get out of the tub to go and fix myself another drink. I shut the laptop to save my place in the TV show and reserve battery power, then I stepped out of the bath. At that point, quite how I am not entirely sure, the shelf that the laptop was sat upon lost its footing and an empty drink glass, a half eaten orange, and my gleaming white MacBook fell into the steaming hot water beneath a shroud of cinnamon smelling bubbles.
I quickly snatched the MacBook from the water and held it over the bath as water poured from its various ports. The cold air turned blue as I cursed loudly while quickly removing the battery and calculating how many books I would have to drop in the bath to equal the cost of one drenched MacBook. How on earth did this happen again? I though to myself.
After four days drying out like a drunkard recovering from a hard weekend of liquor lubricated wildness, I tentatively coaxed the MacBook back to life. To my complete surprise it sprang back to life like and began playing ‘Lost’ from the very point where I had paused it before it took the plunge. There seemed to be no ill effects whatsoever.
It’s been more than three weeks now and still the MacBook is behaving as if nothing untoward has happened. Indeed, this post was written on the very MacBook in question. So will this spell an end of laptop use in the bath? Not at all! Besides, it would take something like 30 or so paperback books to equal the current cost of a new MacBook, and at the slow rate I read that equates to something like 11 years in the bath, in which time I would expect to upgrade my laptop about 3 or 4 times. So by that calculation I’m still winning! Sure, that might not be science, but it’s logic as far as I am concerned.
17 Responses to “SAY HELLO TO MERMAC”
Post a comment
If you have an opinion about this post, then share it! [More about comments]